Day 269
Care about what other people think and you will always be their prisoner - Lao Tzu
I read this quote the other day and it really made me think! It was like a slap across the face confirming exactly how I have been feeling for a while now.
Growing up I wasn't a very confident person. I was an annoying people pleaser and a total sook! During my teen years and into early adulthood I had a group of friends who liked me for me and Iwas so confident and had so much fun and didn't give two hoots what anyone thought of me!
Once I had my first daughter all my old insecurities started to weave their way back into my head. It was especially noticeable when she started back at school and I was thrown into a very new and very judgemental environment! I am sure all mums would understand what I am talking about! I thought I had to try and please everyone and be friends with everyone to make my daughter's schooling experience better. How wrong I was!! I tied myself up in knots for years and for what!! Between that and my busy job I stressed myself into a very bad state emotionally and then I got very sick.
Finally I had a lightbulb moment!
It took my hitting rock bottom to realise that it was me that dug the hole! I sat back and focussed on my family and the few close friends who have always been there for me and saw things through completely different eyes. I finally got to see things clearly!
I am now a prisoner to no one! I worked out that I don't care what other people think! I am happy with who I am. I am comfortable with the crazy behaviour and I am not sorry for sucking it up and getting on with my life and I will stand up for myself whenever I have to regardless of the outcome! I am finally back to the carefree person that I was as a young adult and my family and I are so much better for it!!
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